Introducing: Fractions

A tiny and exciting column from The Common Denominator.

For those of you who have been lamenting how sad your inbox is throughout the week, I have a thrilling announcement.

The Common Denominator is growing — albeit slowly — but growing, nonetheless! In response to this cavalcade of interest from teeming throngs of internet natives and email foreigners, I’m delighted to announce our newest column, Fractions.

Fractions is intended to deliver brief, easily digestible highlights of the goings-on from the world straight to your hungry eyes. Additionally, this column is intended to serve as a reprieve from your midweek depression as you count down the days until the next Where We Are installment.

We (okay, I) at the Common Denominator are actively looking for contributors and fresh perspectives. Today, I’m proud to announce I’ve successfully cajoled a dear friend of mine to write a few sentences for the debut of Fractions. It’s now your turn to congratulate her, make her feel welcome, and insist she contributes more.

Without further ado: Fractions.

÷ From

Mama Cass

on why the podcast age isn’t so bad:

On This Past Weekend podcast with Theo Von, he went to Bedminster Golf Club in New Jersey, to sit with Donald Trump.

As someone who has never tried cocaine, I too learned, like the former president, “Cocaine will turn you into a damn owl homie — you know what I'm saying. Certainly, Trump had no idea what he was saying.

Well-known as a teetotaler, the former president showed that the difference between the buzz from two high-gravity IPAs and the stimulus of some nose candy is as foreign to him as the feeling of modesty. The best part of it all wasn’t the revelations from Trump trying to understand which high is better, rather it was Von referring to the former president as ‘homie’ and on a first-name basis so causally throughout the interview. Definitely the laugh I needed to get through this past week of politics.

÷ RFK Jr. Drops out of the race — well, sort of:

On Friday, the independent candidate for president withdrew his candidacy from November’s election. With millions of dollars spent (and donated), however, the Kennedy name will still grace the ballots of at least ten states where he was able to navigate their election laws.

Rather than remain neutral, he threw his considerable weight (the dude is ripped) behind Donald Trump.

In his announcement, Kennedy left no questions unanswered regarding his feelings toward his former party. While he was explaining how the DNC, with the help of the media, rigged the ‘primary process’ for Kamala Harris after Biden’s political homicide, CNN promptly cut away from the speech.

Either their producers secretly hate the channel or are so tone-deaf they couldn’t sing happy birthday to a two-year-old.

÷ Tulsi Gabbard endorses Donald Trump

Moments ago, the ex-Democrat, former congresswoman, and, most importantly, surfer Tulsi Gabbard endorsed Donald Trump.

So, we’ve got Elon Musk, RFK Jr, and Gabbard all on board supporting the former president. How is it that the Republican Party is not only looking more diverse than the Democrat Party but is looking more left by the minute?

Regardless, I can’t wait to see an administration of pro-Putin stooges, Syrian dupes, anti-vaxxers, and an actual Martian govern the country.